awak my soul :)

first off, mumford & sons is a fantastic band. if they don't know Jesus they unknowingly sing lyrics that refer to Him a whole lot... anyway...

THANKSGIVING BREAK!! Praise the Lord. My motivation took a sharp downward spiral this week and the fact that i have 9 days to be with my family and play catch up with work thrills me!!

looking back on this semester (that amazingly is almost over) i have some regrets, some things i was glad to see happen, and things that i wish could have happened. nonetheless patience has been a continuous theme and i think it will be something i continue to learn until i'm with Jesus.

for one God is teaching me that He grows me in His own time and at His desired pace. I AM NOT IN CONTROL. i'm an eager person and there is nothing i tend to be more eager about than growing closer to and wanting to know more about Jesus. not a bad thing, but sometimes i expect one lesson after another without much time in between the growth spurts.... not always what God has planned though.

i've definitely been challenged this semester more than any other. becoming more like Jesus has been amazing, but a struggle at the same time. my heart has been burdened for the things God wanted them to be this semester and sometimes it wasn't so easy to carry. thankfully God never gives us more than we can carry :) i'm really excited to see His faithfulness transforming me into the woman He wants me to be. His love has been oh so satisfying and i am blessed with the life He laid out for me :) i serve an all powerful God and it is the best thing... hands down.

patience.

love is patient. paul put it first when explaining the way of love to corinth. sometimes i suck just as bad as the corinthians at showing love through patience be it to my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ or anyone else in this world. i was reminded of my sinful nature in this area just a few days ago.

sometimes i have days when it seems like people do one thing after another to test my patience... usually things that annoy me, which encompasses a broad list... but anyway, it's those days that i fail miserably at loving.

then i thought, how in the heck is God so patient? the things i do alone are so far from what His will has for me sometimes... i would have been done with me a long time ago. not only is He patient with me, but oh yeah, the 6 billion other people in the world. no big deal. on days when i do one disobedient act after another, so is everyone else in the world. thinking about that makes my head want to explode and at the same time fall to my knees in worship. my Savior loves me more than i realize most days. His patience is perfect and that is why He is the God of the universe and i am the joyful servant.

i pray that on days when i'm tempted to be impatient, i remember the patience i've received and instead show love.